More Reasons Why I Love My Job

Most notably, the “Third Shift” variation:

A GUIDE TO COFFEE MAKING FOR LIQUID WEB EMPLOYEES

It seems to have come to this since some people were raised in shoebox in t’ middle o’ road and sucked tea out of a damp rag.

Variations to these methods exist, surely. It is not a definitive guide, merely a collection of suggested processes.

Drip Coffee

I have seen French Presses floating around but generally we use the old school industrial Bunn.

First Shift Strength

Your regular cup of coffee, not to strong, not too weak.

1. Remove coffee hamper and dump old filter and grounds
2. Rinse pot thoroughly with water and replace empty pot on heating element
3. Insert new filter into hamper
4. Add 12 heaping plastic spoonfuls of coffee (12 tbs.) (This is my personal opinion of a balanced cup of coffee)
5. Replace hamper in coffee maker
6. Take water container to one of the filtered water dispensers and fill to the line (NEVER use tap – and if you *have* to, always use cold water)
7. Open water cover on the top of the machine and pour in slowly
8. Please make use of the post-it notes on the fridge. Write down the brew time and stick the post-it on the coffee maker
9. Wait and Enjoy

Third Shift Strength

Pour coffee into filter until full.

Raise brewed pot up to light, if you can see light shine through the batch dump out and repeat process.


Also from our wiki:

Detroited (possible Verb, coined 2008) Detroit, located on the lower right hand corner of your palm, is the largest city in the state of Michigan, also one of the baddest cities in the United States. It has become so bad, that people began to use it as a verb. If you’re here you’re probably as confused as I am. If someone say I will detroit you, this is what it means, interpreted by one of our customers:

“Hello,
I consist that you give me a compensation because you waste my time and push
me in trouble with my clients. If you would like to fix the situation you have
to give me a compensation and this is your mistake not mine. Before a month or
more you Detroit me by 2 failure HD by RAID5 and this is impossible and now
you restored an old backup without a permission from me, what is this company
exactly? is it a solutions to destroyed the biz of customers or what?

You did a bad thing at all for me and you have to fix it. This is your fault.

Thanks for trying to Detroit my biz.”

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